Alexander Isak - International C*nt

[Lordshola]

[Paully]

It’s absolutely hilarious how utterly dreadful it has gone so far 

 

I keep thinking he’ll come good but you just never know! Torres was unplayable for these pigs and then garbage  for Chelsea so hopefully this pans out the same!

[Skeletor]

Alexander Isak vs Sunderland:

• 0 GOALS

• 0 ASSISTS

• 0 CHANCES CREATED

• 0 SHOTS ON THE TARGET

• 0% SHOTS ACCURACY

• 2 ACCURATE PASSES

• 14 TOUCHES

• 1 SUCCESSFUL DRIBBLES

• 2 GROUND DUELS WON

• 0% AERIAL DUELS WON

[GideonShandy]

To play 86 minutes and only touch the ball 14 times -- i.e. once every six minutes on average -- is remarkable (whether it was his fault or not).

 

If the ball is passed to you and you take one touch to control it, one to move it forward and then one more to pass it to a teammate, that's three. So he didn't even manage to do that five times in 86 minutes.

[Lush Vlad]

55 minutes ago, GideonShandy said:

To play 86 minutes and only touch the ball 14 times -- i.e. once every six minutes on average -- is remarkable (whether it was his fault or not).

 

If the ball is passed to you and you take one touch to control it, one to move it forward and then one more to pass it to a teammate, that's three. So he didn't even manage to do that five times in 86 minutes.

I might be remembering it wrong and maybe different places use different criteria. But I think that example goes down as one touch? I’m sure that was how Opta did it back in the day. 

 

Although watching last night. I can’t remember him getting on the ball more than about 5-6 times. So maybe it is literally per touch  

[Gola]

 

[KaKa]

Last season at Newcastle:

 

 

Season so far at Liverpool:

 

 

[RUHRLYASLEEVESUP]

8 hours ago, Nobody said:

Not sure he'd get a game ahead of Flataker or Filling at the moment.

Just assuming you're an AIK fan as well, as that's the level he's (not) playing at at the moment. 

Aye & its great to watch 

£130M for that man haha 

[The Prophet]

 

[RUHRLYASLEEVESUP]

Stevesquash

Very Active

Member

Yesterday at 06:19

#2,318

Maybe its Chinese whispers, but a good friend of mine's brother in law, has a box, taking clients to the games. 

After the Forest embarrassment, he was in some area where the agents were all congregated, and there was some real anti-Isak sentiment coming out on behalf of the players. Apparently none of them like him - at all.

I don't know how much i believe this but has anyone else heard that Isak is isolated in the dressing room?

[RUHRLYASLEEVESUP]

Cerberus ★

Yesterday at 23:41

#2,354

A lazy languid lump of shite. He needs aggressive and attacking pacey wingers to create space and we attack like a glacier. Too early to say the worst transfer in football history?
 

Momo

Yesterday at 23:43

#2,355

He’s fucking shit. His and Wirtz’s transfers have fucked us for 5 years.
 

SteveQ78

Yesterday at 23:57

#2,356

He needs to be given a decent pass in behind for starters, ive not seen one since..........erm. but he should atleast be upto match speed by now, is he just lazy or what.
 

Momo

Forum Moderator

Today at 00:06

#2,357

I remember watching Torres and thinking wow. This is the version of Torres who was broken.
 

binomial

Today at 00:38

#2,358

Cerberus said:

A lazy languid lump of shite. He needs aggressive and attacking pacey wingers to create space and we attack like a glacier. Too early to say the worst transfer in football history?

Sooner we sack this manager, the sooner he'll come to life. That's a guarentee. There's only 1 winner here with who outlasts who so I haven't a fucking clue what we're waiting for.

Gakpo, Mo and Dom on the wings aint gonna do shit for him, or any forward that isn't named Suarez that can create something from nothing for himself.
 

Halmeister

Some sort of pun about having a well known member

Member

Today at 00:43

#2,359

It's no wonder he's struggling when we pass the ball along the backline slowly for 5 minutes at a time, before eventually getting it forward, only for Gakpoo/Salah to cut inside into his space and get tackled. Then you've got the end of games when we've thrown Van Dijk up front and we're launching high floaty balls over his head. Yes, he should be doing better off the ball, but we're not playing to his, or anyone's strengths to be honest. He barely gets a touch because of Slothball.
 

rubans

39 minutes ago

#2,360

To be fair every single transfer we have made in the summer currently looks a failure, hopefully with right management and time that will change.
 

LarryHagman ★

35 minutes ago

#2,361

If he put some effort in, he'd get cut more slack. Ekitike is miles better.
 

mark1975

33 minutes ago

#2,362

rubans said:

To be fair every single transfer we have made in the summer currently looks a failure, hopefully with right management and time that will change.

A lot of players who have been ultra consistent for us look like they are running through treacle and full of indecision and fuckups, Macca looks a shadow of the player he was and everyone bar Szobo looks like they have regressed. Either we're the most unlucky team ever to find ourselves with 15 players of mixed ages who are suddenly finished, or Slot is fucking shit.
 

 

[Wilson]

9 minutes ago, RUHRLYASLEEVESUP said:

Stevesquash

Very Active

Member

Yesterday at 06:19

#2,318

Maybe its Chinese whispers, but a good friend of mine's brother in law, has a box, taking clients to the games. 

After the Forest embarrassment, he was in some area where the agents were all congregated, and there was some real anti-Isak sentiment coming out on behalf of the players. Apparently none of them like him - at all.

I don't know how much i believe this but has anyone else heard that Isak is isolated in the dressing room?

 

I have no clue and heard nothing and don't know anyone who would have any clue about anything regarding isak. 

 

But I chose to believe this. 

 

As someone said he looks like a kid who's turned up at a party without an invite. 

 

Beautiful. 

[PauloGeordio]

11 minutes ago, RUHRLYASLEEVESUP said:

Cerberus ★

Yesterday at 23:41

#2,354

A lazy languid lump of shite. He needs aggressive and attacking pacey wingers to create space and we attack like a glacier. Too early to say the worst transfer in football history?
 

Momo

Yesterday at 23:43

#2,355

He’s fucking shit. His and Wirtz’s transfers have fucked us for 5 years.
 

SteveQ78

Yesterday at 23:57

#2,356

He needs to be given a decent pass in behind for starters, ive not seen one since..........erm. but he should atleast be upto match speed by now, is he just lazy or what.
 

Momo

Forum Moderator

Today at 00:06

#2,357

I remember watching Torres and thinking wow. This is the version of Torres who was broken.
 

binomial

Today at 00:38

#2,358

Cerberus said:

A lazy languid lump of shite. He needs aggressive and attacking pacey wingers to create space and we attack like a glacier. Too early to say the worst transfer in football history?

Sooner we sack this manager, the sooner he'll come to life. That's a guarentee. There's only 1 winner here with who outlasts who so I haven't a fucking clue what we're waiting for.

Gakpo, Mo and Dom on the wings aint gonna do shit for him, or any forward that isn't named Suarez that can create something from nothing for himself.
 

Halmeister

Some sort of pun about having a well known member

Member

Today at 00:43

#2,359

It's no wonder he's struggling when we pass the ball along the backline slowly for 5 minutes at a time, before eventually getting it forward, only for Gakpoo/Salah to cut inside into his space and get tackled. Then you've got the end of games when we've thrown Van Dijk up front and we're launching high floaty balls over his head. Yes, he should be doing better off the ball, but we're not playing to his, or anyone's strengths to be honest. He barely gets a touch because of Slothball.
 

rubans

39 minutes ago

#2,360

To be fair every single transfer we have made in the summer currently looks a failure, hopefully with right management and time that will change.
 

LarryHagman ★

35 minutes ago

#2,361

If he put some effort in, he'd get cut more slack. Ekitike is miles better.
 

mark1975

33 minutes ago

#2,362

rubans said:

To be fair every single transfer we have made in the summer currently looks a failure, hopefully with right management and time that will change.

A lot of players who have been ultra consistent for us look like they are running through treacle and full of indecision and fuckups, Macca looks a shadow of the player he was and everyone bar Szobo looks like they have regressed. Either we're the most unlucky team ever to find ourselves with 15 players of mixed ages who are suddenly finished, or Slot is fucking shit.
 

 

Nails it.

[Kilcline]

"Slothball" is top notch 

[Sibierski]

I don’t think he gets a run again for Liverpool after this. He was so bad, you have to give Etitike the nod moving forward or you risk him kicking off. It’s all well and good having two strikers, but if you can’t manage both, it’s going to be a serious problem for Slot and for the next manager, unless one is moved on quickly.

[El Prontonise]

25 minutes ago, The Prophet said:

 

 

Why is the music on these videos always absolutely dire.

[AyeDubbleYoo]

Slothball

[Abacus]

He was just standing around doing nothing at times - no service but also no effort. Ekitike at least put his foot in and ran about a bit, yet he's the one that's dropped. Splendid.

 

Was half wondering if he really was downing tools for us at times last season, or if this groin issue really is holding him back. But then I thought I'd treat myself and choose to believe it's both.

[Sibierski]

10 hours ago, TaylorJ_01 said:

They could have no striker at all and you wouldn't notice a difference. It just bounces side to side then they shoot from outside the box. It's incredibly far away from what works with Isak, which makes it all the more obvious they bought him out of greed not need.

Still pisses me off them signing him after they signed Etitike, because at that point he was not needed at all. But because they had agreed with Isak early in summer they would sign him, they doubled down because they didn’t want to risk not signing him and burning bridges, just for him to then join say Chelsea / Man Utd / Arsenal next summer (or stay us as we close the gap). 
 

It’s PSR back to the beginning, because Liverpool can sell him for £70m to some other club next summer and happily write off £50m. 

[PauloGeordio]

5 minutes ago, El Prontonise said:

 

Why is the music on these videos always absolutely dire.

To match the performance.

[Virtua Stiva]

10 hours ago, BeloEmre said:

Harsh on Heskey, I’m sure he hit double figures in a season a few times for Liverpool. Isak will be lucky to finish with Morientes’ numbers there 

[TheBrownBottle]

3 minutes ago, Virtua Stiva said:

Harsh on Heskey, I’m sure he hit double figures in a season a few times for Liverpool. Isak will be lucky to finish with Morientes’ numbers there 

He managed it once - though Heskey didn’t cost a British record fee, and wasn’t that sort of centre forward. 

[SteV]

1 hour ago, RUHRLYASLEEVESUP said:

A lazy languid lump of shite

Thread title update?

[Scoot]

2 hours ago, Gola said:

 

 

[Jewel]

1 hour ago, The Prophet said:

 

The background music is hilarious and fits the video like a glove.