Ketsbaia

Advocaat vs Pardew: Dick vs Dickhead. One for the ages.

Which Liverpool player(s) are we going for this week, then? I may have to go without Sturridge

"Is that Sean St Ledger's WAG?" "Aye, think it might be."

She looks lush in the 'Shake it Off' video.

He couldn't even keep his corners in-play. There was one near the end when pushing for an equaliser, it was infuriating.

They keep putting a hand out and saying "five". I guess their main worry, being from Sunderland, is that when it gets to eight they'll have to bring out a second hand.

Didn't she go out with Ed Sheeran too? She must have horrific self-esteem to go out with a mediocre, nomadic footballer who's incredibly ugly.

Rumours that Atletico are buying Youri Tielemans from Anderlecht. He'd be quite a coup - he's so good for a 17-year-old.

Hull will go imo, but the rest are interesting. Villa seem to be much better but have tough fixtures, Leicester have a great run of games, QPR have some good players, Burnley have heart and fight, whilst Sunderland have the slight points advantage.

He'll probably go to a Liverpool or Southampton.

Having looked at the fixtures for each of the bottom 6, I don't know what's best for tonight. Villa have tough games, whilst QPR need to start closing the gap - shame they can't both win. I'm pretty sure Hull are going down though. They face Southampton, Liverpool, Palace, Arsenal, Burnley, Spurs and Man Utd. No idea where they'll get 5 or 6 points from.

I was thinking about Brendan Rodgers last night. Reading sacked* him when they were about to drop into the Championship relegation zone. But he's doing well at Liverpool. Does that mean Reading were wrong? Of course not. *technically it was mutual consent, but we all know what that really means.

Mike Ashley can't swim either. It's all adding up.

Retardation levels are going through the roof with these newbies. Run off a cliff, please.

These new posters are absolute mongoloids, like. I know that opinions can't be wrong, but yours are all categorically 100% wrong. So fuck off back to your holes.

Can't believe how lucky Pardew is. I know we were right - we all do - but mates who support Norwich, West Ham etc keep saying things. I just have no idea what to say apart from "can't rewrite history" etc.

We've had the likes of Barnsley, Blackpool and Wigan in the Premier League, but Bournemouth really would be incredible. I hope they do it

Good.

I'd gladly spit in his grave.

For some reason, many fans didn't like SackPardew - the pricks defended him. This campaign will undisputedly unite everyone. Whether it'll have any impact whatsoever, we'll have to wait and see.

I won't relax until Carver's head is on a pole. And not Lewandowski.

We need tall players, a captain, a vice captain and less of these tippy-tappy players that teams are easily dealing with. The transfer policy must also come under scrutiny now.

Heavy defeat, hopefully. I wish misery upon every person at that club.

We'll struggle to get any more points but 36 will still be enough, unfortunately.

Any side with ability would've made it 3 or 4-0, we were that pathetic. Thanks to other results, these are still deep in it. If they lose to Palace, still think they can go.