BlueStar

Seriously though, no chance of McLaren. Ashley's green enough about football to be wowed by household names however poor they may be nowadays, but even my lass knows that McLaren is a joke. If you fuck up as England manager you become the staple "rubbish footbal person" used for jokes in stuff like OK Magazine and Two Pints Of Lager. No-one could be ignorant to his failings. Some of the other potential appointments however...

Yep, it's all real. Just have a watch of the press confrence and it should all become clear.

It depends if "Experienced" means just that or if it's a euphamism for "past it"

OK, might as well rank the main managers being touted on oddschecker in order of my often arbitary preference Jose Mourinho Ottmar Hitzfeld Guus Hiddink Gerard Houllier Alan Shearer Martin O Neill Harry Redknapp Martin Jol Mark Hughes David Moyes Terry Venables Steve Coppell Steve McClaren I have to say like, I wouldn't be pleased with any of them after about 5 so it's pretty difficult to rank them.

Knock knock. Who dare?

If that's true that would be hilarious if it wasn't so tragic. Seriously, having no-one lined up when you sack a manager and scrambling around for the likes of Redknapp and Huges is Fat Fred level stuff.

Says the guy making ultimatums and threatening to quit supporting the club. Uh-huh.

Like I say, even though I've been screaming at the telly everytime SSN say that "we" want Shearer as manager I'd rather the unknown quantity of Shearer than the known quantity of Moyes, Huges, Redknapp, Venebles, McLaren...

Can't face more mediocre grind for the rest of the season under any of the current British managers being touted. Fuck it, all in. Go for Shearer, death or glory, kamakazi it, cross your fingers, close your eyes and hope that the buzz he creates amongst the mong element carries us through the start and he magically becomes the next Keegan. And if not then at least we can all say "We told you so."

Sadly, I'd have to agree. We're going to have to get him out of the way sooner or later, if it's got to be a brit then it may as well be Al

Won't be McLaren. We're going to end up paying compensation through the nose for Huges or Redknapp, half the fans will grumble about it and never take to them, the other half will wear unconvincing smiles and say they need time in a manner that implies they themselves do not believe it, we'll go through a shit spell and pay them off.

Sam dug his own grave, no-one else. But that doesn't mean sacking him was the right choice. Time will tell.

Sounds like at best we're talking about a sideways step, some unremarkable Brit who we hope might last until Shearer but will end up paying off after a year. To add to whatever we'll have to pay off their current club.

Right, gone from excited to dispondent. Don't care who it is now, there's no-one in ther remaining catagories who will last longer than Sam.

Would Redknapp be Allerdyce MkII, Roeder MkIII or Souness MkIV? I'm losing track now.

The triumphant return of Glen Roeder.

Jol Shearer

Right, I'm going to walk past St James on the way to work and go undercover as a mong to get on TV. Then I'll cast off my cunning disguise and say "Please not fucking Shearer!" before they realise their mistake and cut the feed.

If there's a top class manager in the wings, then it's an excellent and bold decision. If it's Shearer or some no-mark, panic stations as far as I'm concerned.

I think I speak for everyone when I say HOLY JESUS SHITTING FUCKING CHRIST. Really wasn't expecting that. Can't say I'm not happy to see the back of him but we'd better have a cracking replacement sitting with all his shit in boxes on Barrack Road as we speak, because if we're going manager hunting now you'd have to be a Grade A Fuckwit to take this job at the moment. Better to get rid sooner rather than later in my opinion though, bollocks to his five year plan.

Lets not get ahead of ourselves lads. We've got to consider losing to Stoke before we can start preparing to lose to Arsenal.

The Liverpool Echo has a predictably different version

Negative football, negative forums.

We'd never sell Barton,we'd be better off turning him in and claiming the reward.

Reminds me of when Roeder was in full on "Glen Roeder doesn't make excuses but..." mode and was pre-emptively blaming defeats on Steven Carr being injured...