The Magedia Thread - Sunderland suck trollolololol

[Dave]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Basically a list of questions that weren't answered in the interview. They get some 'boring' answers so just ask some more. Ashley said he had no intention of answering the media on every single issue so I don't know why they bother.

 

Oh hang on. Yes I do.

[Wallace]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Basically a list of questions that weren't answered in the interview. They get some 'boring' answers so just ask some more. Ashley said he had no intention of answering the media on every single issue so I don't know why they bother.

 

Oh hang on. Yes I do.

 

At least it is very pro Keegan unlike most of the other media who are so disrespectful and treat him as a joke figure.

 

[80]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Am I correct in thinking Caulkin isn't responsible for the headline writing?

[Yorkie]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

He holds Keegan in a positive light, as he tends to do so 90% of the time (with a slight touch of subtlety and intuitiveness, btw, rather than WKL's obvious love-affair with Keano), but i thought that article was a bit naff and held no water at all really. Was just trying to pick the bones from the Ashley interview, picking up on everything that wasn't confirmed. Boring really imo.

[ChezGiven]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Am I correct in thinking Caulkin isn't responsible for the headline writing?

 

I would have thought someone else does that, aye.

 

For the record 

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/11/newcastleunited.premierleague1?gusrc=rss&feed=football

[Yorkie]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Am I correct in thinking Caulkin isn't responsible for the headline writing?

 

I would have thought someone else does that, aye.

 

For the record 

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/11/newcastleunited.premierleague1?gusrc=rss&feed=football

 

Jesus wept. 

[Kimbo]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Am I correct in thinking Caulkin isn't responsible for the headline writing?

 

I would have thought someone else does that, aye.

 

For the record 

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/11/newcastleunited.premierleague1?gusrc=rss&feed=football

 

I think that should say...

 

"Newcastle leave MEDIA in the dark over new signings"

 

They're clearly pissed off at the lack of info being given to them.

[Syrette]

Yawntastic.

 

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/football/article1539572.ece

 

KEVIN KEEGAN is backing Alan Smith to stick two fingers up at his doubters.

 

Smith came on in the second half to a chorus of boos as Newcastle fans turned against the unsettled striker.

 

OK, the only thing he did in his 28-minute cameo was make it 38 games without a goal as Damien Duff and James Milner helped the Toon see off Spanish outfit Valencia.

 

But Smith just needs a break and the nasty reception put the seal on a difficult week which saw him at the centre of a power struggle between boss Keegan and owner Mike Ashley.

 

Ashley wants the former Manchester United man and his £60,000-a-week wages off the payroll but Keegan is standing firm.

 

He said: “Alan Smith is a Newcastle player and that’s it.

 

“He covers in a lot of positions, is a great lad around the place — and whole-hearted.

 

“He may not always be the best player on the pitch but no one will try harder.

 

“I’m not going to try and tell this crowd what to do. It’s a very knowledgable crowd.

 

“They’re the first to cheer if a player scores a goal and sometimes they show their feelings.

 

“They’ve got every right to do that, they pay their money.”

 

Smith, 27, has never got going on Tyneside but Keegan is determined to stick with him.

 

He added: “The solution is mainly in the player’s hands but the manager helps.

 

“That’s what I’ll be doing with Alan and any player who has had a problem with confidence.

 

“I definitely think there’s a lot more to come from Alan. He knows that and we know that.

 

“I’ve known lots of players turn themselves around and I know Alan will.”

 

Argentina defender Fabricio Coloccini was in the stands as Ashley stood in his new replica shirt with the £9million star’s name on the back.

 

But, bizarrely, Keegan was still unsure whether he had actually signed from Deportivo.

 

He continues to be undermined by the London-based Toon board and their relationship was strained further when Arthur Cox left the club at the weekend.

 

It was the latest blow for the Newcastle boss. When asked about the man who first took him to Tyneside in 1982, he just snapped: “He’s left. That’s it.”

 

Valencia’s plane to the North East was delayed and kick-off was put back two hours.

 

Winger Joaquin fired the visitors into a deserved lead but Keegan’s men improved after the break.

 

Duff headed home a Milner corner on 77 minutes before the England Under-21 winger lashed in a late winner.

 

 

 

[biggs]

More sticking in of the boot here from a chick with a dick probably ,at every opportunity and from every angle comes a hack with a axe to grind .

 

 

Newcastle leave Keegan in the dark over new signings

 

    * Louise Taylor

    * The Guardian,

    * Monday August 11 2008

 

For a club boasting a state-of-the-art telephone system, numerous private meeting rooms and high-speed internal email there seems a peculiar lack of frank communication at Newcastle United.

 

Kevin Keegan may be the team's manager but he appears in the dark about certain important issues. Although Fabricio Coloccini watched this flattering 2-1 win over Valencia from the main stand and Mike Ashley, the club's owner, wore a replica shirt emblazoned with the Argentinian defender's name, Keegan appeared remarkably ill-informed about the progress of his £10m transfer from Deportivo La Coruña.

 

"There's nothing official," he said. "I can't tell you anything at the moment, I don't think. He was here, that's for sure. I like his haircut - it's like mine and Terry Mac's were in the 70s. I can't say any more than that at the moment."

 

Then there is Jonás Gutiérrez, an Argentinian winger who upset his former employers, Real Mallorca, by buying out his contract to join Newcastle. The La Liga club are appealing to Fifa for extra compensation and, while Gutiérrez is free to play in friendlies, Newcastle have yet to receive the registration papers from Mallorca that will enable him to play in the Premier League.

 

Asked if this issue would be resolved in time for Sunday's trip to Manchester United, Keegan merely said: "I don't know, I hope so."

 

There was less elaboration about Arthur Cox's sudden departure from the club. On returning to St James' Park in January one of Keegan's first acts was to hire his mentor to a backroom scouting role. Cox, though, is believed to have become disillusioned by the amount of power devolved to Dennis Wise, Newcastle's executive director (football).

 

"Arthur Cox?" said Keegan. "Yeah, he's left the club. That's it." Any explanation? "No. He's left the club."

 

Newcastle's manager does, for the moment, appear to have succeeded in preventing Alan Smith's proposed sale to Everton. While Ashley proved keen to see Smith's £60,000-a-week salary removed from the payroll and David Moyes, Everton's manager, was eager to sign the former Leeds and Manchester United forward, Keegan dug his heels in.

 

With Wise proving an ally and agreeing that Smith should stay, this is one battle the manager might just have won. "Alan Smith is a Newcastle player, no doubt about that," said Keegan, who had late goals from Damien Duff and James Milner to thank for Saturday's victory.

 

While Smith's versatility is important in a shallow squad his Newcastle career has so far lacked guile and goals and Keegan, who hopes for "two more" signings post Coloccini, admitted: "I definitely think there's a lot more to come from Alan. He knows that.

 

"Alan's a player who wants to be successful. He's got a lot of desire. If he didn't have any desire, I'd say 'you're wasting your time'. I've known lots of players turn themselves around, I know Alan will. Alan may not always be the best player on the pitch but no one tries harder."

 

Similarly no one is sure whether Michael Owen will be involved at Old Trafford. The England striker has not played a single pre-season game but should start a full-scale training ground practice match on Thursday. "It'll be Michael himself deciding whether he's fit enough," said Keegan. "Even then we may just decide it's not the right thing to do."

 

Emile Heskey has a thigh injury after limping out of Wigan's 2-0 win against Utrecht in Holland. The England striker lasted just 19 minutes of Wigan's final pre-season warm-up game yesterday before being substituted by Steve Bruce. But the Wigan manager insists that Heskey should be fit to face West Ham in the Premier League on Saturday.

Toon's hair apparent

 

Pressed for insight on his new signing Fabricio Coloccini, Kevin Keegan homed in on what really matters: his haircut, which recalls the bubble-permed monstrosities of Newcastle's past sported by such as Terry McDermott and Keegan himself. Indeed, the Newcastle manager was, in the late Seventies and early Eighties, the bubble-perm poster boy, with McDermott an eager copyist in playing spells at Liverpool and on Tyneside. Coloccini's arrival promises a new era of big-haired folly in a Premier League largely dulled by cropped orthodoxy since the departure of Abel Xavier.

[chicago_shearer]

Seriously, what a f***ing cow. 

 

There must be at least a dozen journalists in the UK who could be out of a job if Newcastle have a successful season without a managerial sacking.  They feed off the soap opera.  Any semblance of stability at NUFC scares the hell out of them.  I can see the attacks getting worse as long as Keegan & Ashley stay quiet about the club's affairs.  These vultures need red meat.

[thewellander]

Has it not occurred to anyone in the press that just because Keegan says he doesn't know to the press may not mean that he actually doesn't know? NUFC are clearly trying to be cautious about what gets leaked out at the club. I think it's more likely that Keegan is very aware of the situation but has been asked to stay quiet about it until it's done, and Ashley's Coloccini shirt was something he did on his own out of impulsiveness.

[chicago_shearer]

Has it not occurred to anyone in the press that just because Keegan says he doesn't know to the press may not mean that he actually doesn't know? NUFC are clearly trying to be cautious about what gets leaked out at the club. I think it's more likely that Keegan is very aware of the situation but has been asked to stay quiet about it until it's done, and Ashley's Coloccini shirt was something he did on his own out of impulsiveness.

 

It is so painfully evident that they have nothing to go on.  No information whatsoever.  They obviously have editors demanding a story about Newcastle, so they resort to mining every platitude and passing comment from Keegan & Ashley's recent interviews.  Common sense plays no part....national papers depend on a constant crisis at Newcastle, and by god they are determined to find one.

 

Louise Taylor, Martin Samuel, Shaun Custis....it will make those fuckers absolutely sick if we do well this season.  Which is all the more reason to do so.

[oldtype]

Would like to know what's going on with that bit about Jonas though. Has the registration still not been resolved?

[samag]

Manchester City boss Mark Hughes is fuming after Vedran Corluka and Stephen Ireland were sold behind his back. (Daily Mirror)

from the BBC gossip today.

i wonder if the media will leave us alone and stick the boot into city now?

[mattypnufc]

Manchester City boss Mark Hughes is fuming after Vedran Corluka and Stephen Ireland were sold behind his back. (Daily Mirror)

from the BBC gossip today.

i wonder if the media will leave us alone and stick the boot into city now?

 

The answer to that will be no.

 

As for all the above shit stirring articles posted...what did anyone expect from the weekend where we won against an impressive Valencia team, played some good football, had our owner come out and give an interview answering every question that was on our minds and sign (albeit not announced) our most expensive defender ever. 

 

Did anyone expect any nice, friendly, positive articles that are not entirely made up of conjecture and speculation?

 

Did anyone expect the press to lay off now that they get zero information from the club directly?

 

Thought not.

[Benwell Lad]

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article4500458.ece

 

Caulkin writes another decent article but the headline is a bit strong.

 

Am I correct in thinking Caulkin isn't responsible for the headline writing?

 

I would have thought someone else does that, aye.

 

For the record 

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2008/aug/11/newcastleunited.premierleague1?gusrc=rss&feed=football

 

She really should be writing for a Sundlund fanzine or in their programme rather than for a once serious newspaper.

[kingkerouac]

As well as Louise Taylor at the Guardian, there's Barry Glendinning - the online sport deputy editor - who is an arse of the highest order.

I recently emailed the sports editor to complain about the openly biased article written by Louise Taylor, and was then subjected to an

afternoon of Glendinning emailing me back to make 'jokes' about NUFC.

He ended it by asking me to name any 'untruths' that LT was responsible for. But he ignored my question about the wisdom of employing

a Sunderland fan as a correspondent of North East football. I was too busy at work to dig through the amount of spin and shite that LT is

responsible for. But needless to say, he seemed to not give a fuck how Toon fans are pissed off with this.

He claimed that the Guardian has no special axe to grind when it comes to The Mags, it would be 'like kicking a blind man's stick'. His words.

I suggest everyone on here sends an email to the gobshite about today's article and then we can combine replies to make a compendium

of the wisdom of Glendinning.

[Dave]

Good intentions mate but wasted time. If you email in then he's won, as you've read it. Either by buying the paper or logging onto the website.

 

After that he doesn't give a fuck what you think, it's mission accomplished.

[AyeDubbleYoo]

Aye, Glendinning is a nob about the toon, shame as he's a decent bloke really. He was starting to spoil the Guardian podcast at the end of last season though.

 

To be fair they probably don't have a specific axe to grind, it's just easy for the whole media to follow the pack mentality and continue to write this rubbish... I don't know if they even realise what they're doing.

 

Anyway, they had plenty of ammo last season but are now beginning to look more and more ridiculous as their sources of information dry up.

 

Hilarious that Taylor thinks that because KK isn't blurting everything to the press he is 'in the dark'. You've done us no favours guys, time to see what it feels like to be frozen out.

[Disco]

Guardian season preview:

 

What heaven sounds like

 

"They've had a good afternoon. Here they are looking for number five. Philip Albert... Ooooooh! Absolutely glorious!"

v Manchester United, 1996

 

Then and now

 

1893: Formed from the union of Newcastle West End and Newcastle East End, their first home League match at St James' brings in gate receipts of about 40 pence. 2008: generating that sort of income every split second from vol au vent sales in the Platinum Suite alone.

 

The credit cruncher

 

Mike Ashley. Rated as the 54th richest man in Britain with a personal fortune of £1.4bn. The sportswear magnate was once described as "Britain's answer to Howard Hughes", yet now seems happy to wobble his enormous tummy in front of thousands of total strangers.

 

Their prospects

 

Despite his vast fortune and fondness for the Toon Army Ashley has been reluctant to invest heavily in the squad and has imposed a wage cap, with the result that the team is short of depth. Much will depend on the fitness of Michael Owen and Mark Viduka - hardly a reassuring sentence given their histories.

 

Mission for Doctor Who

 

Bring back Hughie Gallagher. The Scottish forward whose goals and mercurial skill led Toon to their last League title back in 1927. Combination of brilliance, belligerence (after one game he once pushed the ref into a bath) and drinking would delight fans and headline writers alike.

 

See the ground on Google Earth

 

Search "St James' Park" to see the fabulous if lopsided stadium, from the air appearing a fusion of two different grounds.

 

The players

 

International game

 

St James' Park is truly cosmopolitan with a rich mix of South Americans, Europeans and Africans plus an Australian and a Canadian. None speaks with such an impenetrable accent as Terry McDermott, however.

 

Fab enough for Fabio

 

Guthrie. This neat and busy midfielder would surely make an ideal stand-in for Gareth Barry.

 

Breaking through

 

Kazenga LuaLua. Teenage forward from the Congo whose older brother Lomana used to delight the Tyneside public with his acrobatic goal celebrations. Kazenga is fast and tricky and should get a chance to show off his tumbling skills a bit this season.

 

Newcastle's got talent

 

Geremi has claimed that if he wasn't a footballer he'd like to be a private detective. Since moving to St James' Park he certainly seems to have perfected the art of moving around so stealthily nobody notices him.

 

Who'll give 110%

 

Shay Given. Top-class Irish goalkeeper and loyal club servant who has done an admirable job disguising the Mags' defensive frailties for over a decade. Thousands of Geordie bairns have been named in his honour.

 

Who'll give 1,000%

 

Joey Barton. The player who is to the anger management industry what sweat is to deodorant.

 

Story of the summer

 

Ashley insists that in future the players must pay for their club suits ... Keegan asks for more transfer funds ... Barton talks to his lawyers.

 

The manager

 

Kevin Keegan

 

Here are your best bits

 

Reviving Newcastle when they were near the bottom of the Second Division; almost winning the Premier League; signing Alan Shearer; England's first competitive win over Germany for 34 years in 2000.

 

His tactics board says

 

"Score one more than them. Entertain. Pray Shay has good game."

 

His Post-It notes say

 

"Find out what Dennis Wise does" ... "Buy eccentric South American striker" ... "Take deep breaths before post-match interviews"

 

New face

 

Danny Guthrie

from Liverpool, undisclosed

 

Described by Kevin Keegan as 'a mix between Paul Bracewell and Rob Lee'. The Shropshire lad is a box-to-box midfielder fighting with Joey Barton for a place. Not, literally, of course. 'Pocket general' status beckons.

 

Last season

 

 

Points per game

v top four 0.13

v the rest 1.40

 

FA Cup 4th round

 

Carling Cup 3rd round

 

League discipline Y59 R1

 

Top scorer Owen 11

 

Fair play league 15th

 

In this dog-eat-dog league they're...

 

A Border Collie

 

A breed that used to be associated with shearers, but is now frequently made available to more cosmopolitan owners. Instantly recognisable because of its black and white coat, which it can be seen in whatever the season.

 

[buzza]

Just to give it a positive spin;

We are big news and as the old adage goes: "any news is good news", we are kept in the public eye permanently because WE sell newspapers. WE keep those slimy turds in a job (social conscience), get on your knees and thank us for keeping you in a job Louise because if it wasn't for us you'd have nothing to write about (nobody is interested in Sunderland!).

I don't think any "real" fan holds any malice towards us, we're nothing like Leeds (hatred) and we were and I think still are a lot of people's second "interest" in footballing terms, this can only be a good thing, raises our profile and anyone with half a brain must be able to see through the 90% bullshitt written about us.

 

[Dave]

Cliché-tastic. Yawn.

[buzza]

P.S. We will shortly be known again (and loved) for our attacking football and utopian footballing outlook...Keegan is our King!!

[buzza]

Are you yawning at me??

[Dave]

The last posted article. Not my fault you so rudely posted in between.