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Gutted. Remember Sir Bobby Robson calling him his 'blue chip player', and is someone I would have liked to see back at our club at some point.

 

Model professional, and will be sorely missed. RIP.

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The Dan Walker blog on the BBC website, recounting seeing Gary Speed yesterday.  It just doesn't make sense.

 

Aye that's the one,

 

"Mr Walker said: “He was on great form, cracking jokes and asking about my family and kids. He was talking passionately about the future. There was absolutely no indication at all.

“He gave me the impression that he was really looking forward to his kids growing up to be really good footballers and Wales qualifying for the World Cup.”"

 

See this is what I don't understand. I know depressed people must put on a front but to go from waxing lyrical about all your future aspirations to then committing suicide HOURS later, I can't compute it. I know it probably is depression but do you think there's any chance that something may have happened just yesterday that drove him to this??!?

 

something like this must play on a persons mind for ages. i wouldn't think you would just do this on a whim. makes me really sad to think that he has been considering this for a while.

 

Particularly considering the method he apparently used isn't exactly the kind of thing you could do without 'planning' it to at least some degree. :(

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The Dan Walker blog on the BBC website, recounting seeing Gary Speed yesterday.  It just doesn't make sense.

 

Aye that's the one,

 

"Mr Walker said: “He was on great form, cracking jokes and asking about my family and kids. He was talking passionately about the future. There was absolutely no indication at all.

“He gave me the impression that he was really looking forward to his kids growing up to be really good footballers and Wales qualifying for the World Cup.”"

 

See this is what I don't understand. I know depressed people must put on a front but to go from waxing lyrical about all your future aspirations to then committing suicide HOURS later, I can't compute it. I know it probably is depression but do you think there's any chance that something may have happened just yesterday that drove him to this??!?

 

something like this must play on a persons mind for ages. i wouldn't think you would just do this on a whim. makes me really sad to think that he has been considering this for a while.

 

Probably the case however I just can't understand how you can talk about your kids etc. like he did knowing in the back of your mind that there's a strong possibility you weren't going to be there to see it. Can't work it out.

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The Dan Walker blog on the BBC website, recounting seeing Gary Speed yesterday.  It just doesn't make sense.

 

Aye that's the one,

 

"Mr Walker said: “He was on great form, cracking jokes and asking about my family and kids. He was talking passionately about the future. There was absolutely no indication at all.

“He gave me the impression that he was really looking forward to his kids growing up to be really good footballers and Wales qualifying for the World Cup.”"

 

See this is what I don't understand. I know depressed people must put on a front but to go from waxing lyrical about all your future aspirations to then committing suicide HOURS later, I can't compute it. I know it probably is depression but do you think there's any chance that something may have happened just yesterday that drove him to this??!?

 

On the one hand you can just compartmentalise your mind/life - have a 'this is what I'm going to do if I don't feel terrible' story as well as a 'this is what will happen if I do' one. On the other he could just have become reasonably sophisticated at lying to people and covering up his reality. The thing with lies is they're all the easier to tell if the recipient isn't expecting to hear them, and as has been shown today, most people couldn't even imagine him not thinking his life was sound, so any indication to the contrary was easily glossed over.

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i need an explanation or a reason - no matter how trivial - because right now i cant fathom why this happened. hanging is a pre-meditated act and that is fucking scary. i don't cry ever, but today i wish i could. just seeing how normal he was yesterday, he was talking about a future that he'll never have :(

 

it feels worse than it did earlier tbh

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The Dan Walker blog on the BBC website, recounting seeing Gary Speed yesterday.  It just doesn't make sense.

 

Aye that's the one,

 

"Mr Walker said: “He was on great form, cracking jokes and asking about my family and kids. He was talking passionately about the future. There was absolutely no indication at all.

“He gave me the impression that he was really looking forward to his kids growing up to be really good footballers and Wales qualifying for the World Cup.”"

 

See this is what I don't understand. I know depressed people must put on a front but to go from waxing lyrical about all your future aspirations to then committing suicide HOURS later, I can't compute it. I know it probably is depression but do you think there's any chance that something may have happened just yesterday that drove him to this??!?

 

something like this must play on a persons mind for ages. i wouldn't think you would just do this on a whim. makes me really sad to think that he has been considering this for a while.

 

Probably the case however I just can't understand how you can talk about your kids etc. like he did knowing in the back of your mind that there's a strong possibility you weren't going to be there to see it. Can't work it out.

 

Again, maybe he thought that if there was any doubt in his mind about killing himself that he had to try and pretend there was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to stay alive - in order to stop others worrying and let his kids grow up not expecting to find something terrible behind every closed door, especially if it would have been for no good reason had it turned out he did manage to 'survive' himself in the end, so to speak.

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The Dan Walker blog on the BBC website, recounting seeing Gary Speed yesterday.  It just doesn't make sense.

 

Aye that's the one,

 

"Mr Walker said: “He was on great form, cracking jokes and asking about my family and kids. He was talking passionately about the future. There was absolutely no indication at all.

“He gave me the impression that he was really looking forward to his kids growing up to be really good footballers and Wales qualifying for the World Cup.”"

 

See this is what I don't understand. I know depressed people must put on a front but to go from waxing lyrical about all your future aspirations to then committing suicide HOURS later, I can't compute it. I know it probably is depression but do you think there's any chance that something may have happened just yesterday that drove him to this??!?

 

something like this must play on a persons mind for ages. i wouldn't think you would just do this on a whim. makes me really sad to think that he has been considering this for a while.

 

Particularly considering the method he apparently used isn't exactly the kind of thing you could do without 'planning' it to at least some degree. :(

 

but if u asked everyone on this forum 'how many of you have considered suicide?'

how many would answer truthfully? none is my guess. its a very taboo subject.

peolple need to know that there are people to talk to and places to go.

 

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So sad, devastating and puzzling too.

I was in Amsterdam when I heard, for Newcastle supporters, Welsh football fans and others too it will probably be a JFK/Diana type moment where you will always remember where you heard the tragic news.

A wonderful footballer, possibly underated by some but never by fellow professionals. Probably the best midfield header of a ball I have ever seen.

So sad.

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How is it pre-meditated?  Depression can cause you to make decisions on an impulse.

 

Not sure but I think they mean how you only need a couple of seconds to decide and act on throwing yourself in front of a train. Would have needed some minutes to hang himself, if not more because not all that many of us have man-strength cord and a strong bannister to hand, and knowledge of how to tie a noose...

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How is it pre-meditated?  Depression can cause you to make decisions on an impulse.

 

Totally appreciate that. :thup:

 

Was just making the point that to me, hanging isn't really the kind of thing you could do without ever thinking about doing it before. Not even sure where I could do it in our house, for example. We don't even have any kind of strong cord or rope about the house that I could impulsively pick up and decide to use, and so on. IMO if it was a totally impulsive decision, personally I'd expect it to be a prescribed medicine overdose, or excessive alcohol or such. Just my initial opinion, I'm sure others will disagree.

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Someone on the radio before was saying leeds fans consider him one of their own. Everton fans see him as part of the Everton family. Here he's a honorary geordie. Pretty much sums the man up really, loved and respected by everyone.

 

R.I.P Gary, you'll be sadly missed.

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2) BEST MIDFIELDER

Gary Speed.  Where else can you find a midfielder with a left foot and a head?  Should never have signed for those cretins at Bolton.

 

8) WE SHOULD NEVER HAVE LET GO...

Gary Speed

 

17) BEST LOOKING PLAYER

Gary Speed (apparently)

 

20) BEST STARTING XI OF THE DECADE

Given

Beye

Bernard

Woodgate

Taylor

Speed

Dyer

Solano

Robert

Shearer

Bellamy

 

 

Just watched one of the hardest news reports I've ever seen, and couldn't help myself when it showed Shay Given before the game in tears. RIP.

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How is it pre-meditated?  Depression can cause you to make decisions on an impulse.

 

Not sure but I think they mean how you only need a couple of seconds to decide and act on throwing yourself in front of a train. Would have needed some minutes to hang himself, if not more because not all that many of us have man-strength cord and a strong bannister to hand, and knowledge of how to tie a noose...

 

On the note of throwing yourself in front of a train. Surely you'd have to walk there, wait for one etc? You'd still be taking time to think about this beforehand. It's not like every person that does so has just so happened to be walking beside a train track by chance and thought 'fuck it'.

 

Suicide could be a split second decision, or it could have been planned for days. Who knows what mindset he was in? That's the saddest thing, this conversation could go round in circles for years to come. Feels like one of those instances we'll never discover the true extent as to why it came to this. :(

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I really can't stop thinking about this, I'm still in a state of shock over the whole thing.

 

I think the reason I can't stop thinking about it was him appearing to be his usual self on Football Focus yesterday, and the horrendous thoughts that had to enter the mind of a man who everyone thought of as such a genuinely nice guy.

 

Really at a loss over this.

 

I'm not normally one that is saddened by the loss of life over someone that I never knew, but I really don't think I was as moved over SBR's passing as I have been today.

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