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Daft questions (football edition)

Decky

by Decky
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Yorkie

Yorkie

Posted
Posted

The key thing for me is just not being a relentless gobshite, who knows when to let the moments speak for themselves. Matterface is the absolute worst, like. He's got Fletcher's non-stop waffling, Drury's contrived soliloquys at big moments and has absolutely zero charisma. He delivers everything through the eyes of ITV, like it's ITV giving you this 'drama.' He's so tabloid/Sky News/Good Morning Britain it's untrue. 

 

All the BBC ones are fine to good (Pearce has his moments mind); Matterface is a great advert for Tyldesley and Jon Champion continues to be one of the very best. In terms of Sky, Tyler needs to retire but Rob Hawthorne is good. Really like Weaver (Gary?) as well and dunno why he only gets EFL.

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toon25

toon25

Posted
Posted

I honestly think we've a dearth of decent commentators these days. Vicky Sparks is beyond dreadful, 'that night night in Munich' Tyldesley needs turning into glue and Guy Mowbray, or whatever he's called, needs sticking in recycling bin with a load of tinsel.

 

It's chronic how major TV broadcasters haven't in the least tried to bring through and nurture talent

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Pilko

Pilko

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Rafalove said:

What makes a good commentator?

 

For me it's having a good vocabulary and a passionate voice but knowing when to shut up and let the pictures speak for themselves.

 

Jon Champion & Ally McCoist are a great combo that cover all of these bases. Quite like Daniel Mann on Sky too. Matterface, Fletcher and Cliche Clive are the absolute pits though along with the screechy bird ITV have had on lately.

 

If you come away from footy someone like Wayne Mardle on the darts is a great commentator; knowledgeable, has the insight but always super excited to be there and goes wild when there's some high standard play, but doesn't jabber on constantly and gives periods of quiet.

 

Compare that with miserable boring wankers like Lawro, Guy Mowbray, Nasser Hussain when he used to do the cricket, the whinging Mark Bright etc and it's like a totally different art.

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HaydnNUFC

HaydnNUFC

Posted
Posted

Don't like Peter Drury and resent all the fanfare he gets as if he's some hidden gem. He's overrated as fuck, trying constantly trying to sound Shakespearean-esque with over the top metaphors, such a bore. Martin Tyler is finished and should retire. Almost all the others I can take or leave, meh on them all.

 

But I do think Daniel Mann is underrated and never seems to get merely PL games. He did a lot of our games in the Championship under Benitez; "And Perez finds the net!" away at Brighton, "Oh that's venomous!" away at Derby :lol: , proper passionate and shouty when goals go in but never over the top, never tries to fill silence in with waffle like that cunt Matterface. He's absolutely repulsive. Hope he gets severe cholera.

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HaydnNUFC

HaydnNUFC

Posted
Posted (edited)
8 minutes ago, Yorkie said:

Man I thought Daniel Mann was Gary Weaver. That's who I meant earlier anyway.

 

He's really underrated imo, never gets more than Championship games on Sky seemingly. The win at Brighton under Benitez was memorable and the Leeds Derby play off semi, commentary matched the importance and quality of the game imo. Linked the highlights of both below.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by HaydnNUFC

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TheBrownBottle

TheBrownBottle

Posted
Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, Rafalove said:

What makes a good commentator?

My favourite remains Barry Davies.  Someone who can exclaim at true moments of wonder, but the rest of the time remains calm and composed and understands that the audience doesn’t need to be told something is exciting - we can make our own minds up on that one.  And as others have said, not feel the need to punctuate any silence with constant fucking wittering. 

 

I also loved the fact he sounded like a Victorian schoolmaster and would get genuinely miffed about things.  My favourite remains him exclaiming that ‘Italy have lost BECAUSE THEY WILL NOT LEARN’ following South Korea’s late winner in 2002 - because it was both true and hilarious.

 

Edit: an example of him losing his shit for good reason is Supermac’s half-volley peach vs West Brom

 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tyckt3H6I6Y&t=101s

 

 

Edited by TheBrownBottle

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Groundhog63

Groundhog63

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, TheBrownBottle said:

 

 

Edit: an example of him losing his shit for good reason is Supermac’s half-volley peach vs West Brom

 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tyckt3H6I6Y&t=101s

 

 

 

Enjoyed that. Mentioned before but we got dragged upto Berwick in 73 so had to make do with Archie McPherson and Sportscene, not the same ?

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OpenC

OpenC

Posted
Posted (edited)

 

I listen to more football than I watch and while that's obviously a whole different art, I always like John Murray on R5 although he sometimes goes a little bit Tango Advert when he gets himself excited :)  

 

 

Edited by OpenC

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joeyt

joeyt

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, Pilko said:

 

Compare that with miserable boring wankers like Lawro, Guy Mowbray, Nasser Hussain when he used to do the cricket, the whinging Mark Bright etc and it's like a totally different art.

 

Nasser is one of the best cricket commentators around.

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Mike

Mike

Posted
Posted
13 hours ago, Rafalove said:

What makes a good commentator?

 

Knowledge, passion, humor, an understanding of the moment. Getting that they're there to accentuate the action, not dominate it. Someone who can feather context (tactical or dramatic) to the moment while also conveying the moment itself.

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toon25

toon25

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, OpenC said:

 

I listen to more football than I watch and while that's obviously a whole different art, I always like John Murray on R5 although he sometimes goes a little bit Tango Advert when he gets himself excited :)  

 

 

 

Agree with this.

 

What happened to Alan Green btw? Was he binned or did he retire?

 

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Disco

Disco

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, toon25 said:

Agree with this.

 

What happened to Alan Green btw? Was he binned or did he retire?

 

 

BBC sacked him as he wouldn't change his name to Alan Brown as part of their woke agenda.

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Astroblack

Astroblack

Posted
Posted

Ian Crocker is another great one. 
 

Drury says something stupid every five or so minutes. I can take him but you’re bound to groan listening to his commentary. Arlo White says something stupid every minute. Hate him with a passion. 
 

the American commentators are the worst. You get phrases like “it’s in the net”. The other day I heard a commentator refer to a player as “that guy”. That’s unacceptable. 

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Pilko

Pilko

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, joeyt said:

 

Nasser is one of the best cricket commentators around.

 

I can't stand him, find him to be incredibly negative and miserable and rarely finds any joy in anything. Suppose it goes to show that a "good commentator" is quite hard to agree on, although seemingly this thread is in consensus about the shittest ones. 

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